Kumpulan Funny Short Stories
1. The child
and his mother
A curious child asked his mother: “Mommy, why are some
of your hairs turning grey?”
The mother tried to use this occasion to teach her
child: “It is because of you, dear. Every bad action of yours will turn one of
my hairs grey!”
The child replied innocently: “Now I know why
grandmother has only grey hairs on her head.”
Anak dan Ibunya
Seorang anak penasaran bertanya kepada ibunya:
"Ibu, mengapa beberapa rambut Anda beruban?"
Sang ibu mencoba menggunakan kesempatan ini untuk
mengajar anaknya: "Hal ini karena kasih, Sayang.
Setiap tindakan buruk Anda akan mengubah satu abu-abu
rambut saya! "
Sahut anak itu polos: "Sekarang aku tahu mengapa
nenek hanya memiliki uban di kepalanya."
2. Wrong Email
Address
A couple
going on vacation but his wife was on a business trip so he went to the
destination first and his wife would meet him the next day.
When he
reached his hotel, he decided to send his wife a quick email.
Unfortunately,
when typing her address, he mistyped a letter and his note was directed instead
to an elderly preacher’s wife whose husband had passed away only the day
before.
When the
grieving widow checked her email, she took one look at the monitor, let out a
piercing scream, and fell to the floor in a dead faint.
At the
sound, her family rushed into the room and saw this note on the screen:
Dearest
Wife,
Just got
checked in. Everything prepared for your arrival tomorrow.
Alamat email
yang salah
Seorang
pasangan pergi berlibur tetapi istrinya sedang dalam perjalanan bisnis sehingga
ia pergi ke tujuan pertama dan istrinya akan bertemu dengannya pada hari
berikutnya.
Ketika ia
tiba di hotel, dia memutuskan untuk mengirim istrinya email cepat.
Sayangnya,
ketika mengetik alamatnya, dia salah tulis surat dan catatan-nya diarahkan
bukan untuk istri seorang pengkhotbah tua itu yang suaminya telah meninggal
hanya sehari sebelumnya.
Ketika janda
berduka memeriksa email, dia mengambil satu melihat monitor, menjerit menusuk,
dan jatuh ke lantai dalam mati suri.
Pada suara,
keluarganya bergegas masuk ke kamar dan melihat catatan ini di layar:
Istri
tercinta,Baru saja check in Semuanya siap untuk kedatangan Anda besok.
3. Will’s
experience at the airport
After his
return from Rome, Will couldn't find his luggage in the airport baggage area.
He went to the lost luggage office and told the woman there that his bags
hadn't shown up on the carousel.
She smiled
and told him not to worry because they were trained professionals and he was in
good hands.
Then she
asked Will, “Has your plane arrived yet?”
Pengalaman
Will di Bandara
Setelah
kembali dari Roma, Will tidak bisa menemukan barang-barang di daerah
bagasi bandara. Ia pergi ke kantor kehilangan bagasi dan mengatakan kepada
wanita ada yang tasnya tidak muncul pada carousel.
Dia
tersenyum dan mengatakan kepadanya untuk tidak khawatir karena mereka
profesional terlatih dan dia berada di tangan yang baik.
Kemudian ia
bertanya Will, "Apakah pesawat Anda tiba belum?"
4.
Mouthology
A Professor was traveling by boat. On his way he asked
the sailor:
“Do you know Biology, Ecology, Zoology, Geography,
physiology?
The sailor said no to all his questions.
Professor: What the hell do you know on earth. You
will die of illiteracy.
After a while the boat started sinking. The Sailor
asked the Professor, do you know swiminology & escapology from sharkology?
The professor said no.
Sailor: “Well, sharkology & crocodilogy will eat
your assology, headology & you will dieology because of your mouthology.
Mouthology
Profesor A bepergian dengan perahu. Dalam perjalanan
ia bertanya pelaut:
"Apakah Anda tahu Biologi, Ekologi, Zoologi,
Geografi, fisiologi?
Pelaut mengatakan tidak untuk semua pertanyaan itu.
Profesor: Apa kau tahu di bumi. Anda akan mati buta
huruf.
Setelah beberapa saat perahu mulai tenggelam. Sailor
bertanya Profesor, apakah Anda tahu swiminology & escapology dari
sharkology?
Sang profesor mengatakan tidak.
Sailor: "Yah, sharkology & crocodilogy akan
makan assology Anda, headology & Anda akan dieology karena mouthology Anda.
The Wolf and
The Lamb
A lamb was
grazing with a flock of sheep one day. She soon found some sweet grass at the
edge of the field. Farther and farther she went, away from the others.
She was
enjoying herself so much that she did not notice a wolf coming nearer to her.
However, when it pounced on her, she was quick to start pleading, “Please,
please don’t eat me yet. My stomach is full of grass. If you wait a while, I
will taste much better.”
The wolf
thought that was a good idea, so he sat down and waited.
After a
while, the lamb said, “If you allow me to dance, the grass in my stomach will
be digested faster.” Again the wolf agreed. While the lamb was dancing, she had
a new idea. She said, “Please take the bell from around my neck. If you ring it
as hard as you can, I will be able to dance even faster.”
The wolf
took the bell and rang it as hard as he could. The shepherd heard the bell
ringing and quickly sent his dogs to find the missing lamb. The barking dogs
frightened the wolf away and saved the lamb’s life.
Serigala Dan
Anak Domba
Domba A
adalah merumput dengan kawanan domba satu hari. Dia segera
menemukan beberapa rumput manis di pinggir lapangan. Semakin jauh ia
pergi, jauh dari yang lain.
Dia
menikmati dirinya sendiri sehingga dia tidak melihat serigala mendekat padanya.
Namun, ketika menerkam, dia cepat mulai memohon, "Tolong, tolong jangan
makan saya belum. Perutku penuh rumput. Jika Anda menunggu beberapa saat, saya
akan terasa jauh lebih baik. "
Pikiran
serigala itu adalah ide yang baik, jadi ia duduk dan menunggu. Setelah beberapa
saat, anak domba berkata, "Jika Anda mengizinkan saya untuk menari, rumput
di saya perut akan dicerna lebih cepat. "Sekali lagi serigala setuju.
Sementara anak domba menari, dia punya ide baru. Dia mengatakan, "Silakan
mengambil bel dari leherku. Jika Anda membunyikannya sekeras bisa, saya akan
bisa menari lebih cepat. "
Serigala
mengambil bel dan berdering sekeras yang dia bisa. Gembala mendengar bel
berdering dan cepat dikirim anjing untuk menemukan domba yang hilang. Anjing
menggonggong takut serigala itu dan menyelamatkan nyawa domba.
Mr. Knott and Mr. Watt
Mr.Knott is a lecturer
at a university. One day, he was very tired and went home with the aches in all
of his body. When he arrived home, his phone rang and he picked it up right
away.
- Hallo, who’s there?
- Watt
- What is your name?
- Watt
- I asked!! What’s your name?!!
- Watt is my name. Are you john?
- No, I knott
- Could you tell your name?
- Will Knott
Both men are hung up and talking “What a rude man!”
Arti :
Tuan Knott dan Tuan Watt
Mr.Knott
merupakan seorang dosen di sebuah Universitas. Hari ini, dia sangat lelah dan
pulang kerumah dengan tubuh yang pegal-pegal. Ketika tiba dirumah, teleponnya
berdering dan ia segera mengangkatnya.
Hallo, siapa
disana?
Watt
Siapa nama
Anda?
Watt
Aku bertanya!!
Siapa Namamu?!!
Watt adalah
nama saya. Apakah Anda john?
No, I knott
Bisakah Anda
sebutkan nama Anda?
Will Knott
Kedua pria tersebut menutup telepon dan berkata
“Dasar, laki-laki kasar!!”
Two People Are Killed
There are two dead people were asked the guardian angel gate before going to the afterlife.
Angel : Why are you here?
Person 1 : "When I was at the office, I was told the neighbor that my wife
was having an affair with another man in my apartment.
Therefore I immediately raced home. Up at my house
tossed around the room looking for the man. Angry,
I threw what I found out the window, including suitcases
available at the bedside. I was so emotional I get hit
the heart. "
Angel : "And you?" (ask the angels to the second)
Person 2 : "Hhh ... I was in a suitcase that had been dumped .."
There are two dead people were asked the guardian angel gate before going to the afterlife.
Angel : Why are you here?
Person 1 : "When I was at the office, I was told the neighbor that my wife
was having an affair with another man in my apartment.
Therefore I immediately raced home. Up at my house
tossed around the room looking for the man. Angry,
I threw what I found out the window, including suitcases
available at the bedside. I was so emotional I get hit
the heart. "
Angel : "And you?" (ask the angels to the second)
Person 2 : "Hhh ... I was in a suitcase that had been dumped .."
Cerita Lucu Dua Orang Mati
Ada
dua orang yang sudah mati ditanya malaikat penjaga gerbang sebelum masuk ke
alam baka.
Malaikat: Kenapa kamu ada di sini?
Orang 1: "Sewaktu saya dikantor, saya diberitahu tetangga kalau istri
saya sedang berselingkuh dengan laki-laki lain di apartemen saya.
Karena itu saya langsung ngebut pulang. Sampai di rumah saya
obrak-abrik seluruh kamar mencari laki-laki itu. Marah nggak ketemu,
saya lempar apa saja yang saya temukan keluar jendela, termasuk koper
yang ada di samping tempat tidur. Saking emosinya saya kena serangan
jantung."
Malaikat: "Kalau kamu?" (tanya malaikat ke orang kedua)
Orang 2: "Hhh… saya ada di dalam koper yang dibuang tadi.."
Malaikat: Kenapa kamu ada di sini?
Orang 1: "Sewaktu saya dikantor, saya diberitahu tetangga kalau istri
saya sedang berselingkuh dengan laki-laki lain di apartemen saya.
Karena itu saya langsung ngebut pulang. Sampai di rumah saya
obrak-abrik seluruh kamar mencari laki-laki itu. Marah nggak ketemu,
saya lempar apa saja yang saya temukan keluar jendela, termasuk koper
yang ada di samping tempat tidur. Saking emosinya saya kena serangan
jantung."
Malaikat: "Kalau kamu?" (tanya malaikat ke orang kedua)
Orang 2: "Hhh… saya ada di dalam koper yang dibuang tadi.."
A little boy asked his father: “Daddy, how much does it cost to get
married?”
The father replied: “I don’t know son, I’m still paying.”
The father replied: “I don’t know son, I’m still paying.”
Ada anak bertanya pada ayahnya: “Pah, menikah membutuhkan biaya berapa
pah?”
Ayahnya menjawab: “Saya tidak tahu nak, sampai sekarang saja Papah masih bayar.”
Ayahnya menjawab: “Saya tidak tahu nak, sampai sekarang saja Papah masih bayar.”
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Teacher: “Jimmy, why aren’t you writing?”
Budi: “I don’t has a pencil.”
Teacher: “Jimmy, that’s not a correct sentence. The correct way is: I don’t have a pencil; he doesn’t have a pencil; we don’t have a pencil.”
Budi: “Who stole all the pencils then?”
Teacher: “Jimmy, why aren’t you writing?”
Budi: “I don’t has a pencil.”
Teacher: “Jimmy, that’s not a correct sentence. The correct way is: I don’t have a pencil; he doesn’t have a pencil; we don’t have a pencil.”
Budi: “Who stole all the pencils then?”
Guru : “Budi, mengapa kamu tidak menulis?”
Budi: “I don’t has a pencil. (saya tidak punya pensil: red)”
Guru : Bud, I don’t has a pencil itu kalimat yang salah. Yang benar adalah: I don’t have a pencil; dia tidak punya pensil, kita tidak punya pensil.”
Budi :”Lalu, siapa yang mencuri semua pensil?”
Budi: “I don’t has a pencil. (saya tidak punya pensil: red)”
Guru : Bud, I don’t has a pencil itu kalimat yang salah. Yang benar adalah: I don’t have a pencil; dia tidak punya pensil, kita tidak punya pensil.”
Budi :”Lalu, siapa yang mencuri semua pensil?”
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